2 minggu berlalu...everyday..everything becomes more tough and tense..after meeting with supervisor yesterday, i started to feel that i don't fit with this course..ottukay ne??
lets me recap back wats happen in the 1st week..first day definitely was the tired day ever! msuk hri seterusnya, takde lah rsa penat sgt..kire bleh adapt ler dgn keadaan tu..
penat fizikal bleh stand, but mentally??huhu hanya tuhan jek yang tau..seriusly, 1st week tu sy rsa mcm brada di atas awang-awangan..i still cannot catch up wats going on..lectures??huh totally blur..cannot absorb any..csl?? somes dr did gave us guidelines wat shud we do but somes just mention dat we no need to “learnt” it now..so theres no use if he teach us now..coz 4sure we will forget bout it..
haizz ottukay?? each dr said different things..dunno which 1 shud i follow..then ada yg ckp at dis stage just fokus on history taking and how to do the physical examination..no need to worry how to diagnose..but yet, during bst or spvsor meeting..we still kene tembak with all those qs..eventhough dr x marah if we answer it wrong..it still affect me..i started to feel dat i’m the “stupid/lembap” one compare to others..hayyooo so stresss oo..
1st week..totally busy like hell..smpaikan takde masa nak interact with my friends..especially dgn amin..Lol tak psal2 kene cop sombong..sorry..i didnt meant to neglect u..somemore we all like busy kehulur kehilir naik turun bukit cari “mangsa” ntuk diclerk..plus most of us not in the same gp..so mmg jarang ler ada chance nak hang out sama..
case clerking-procedures-bst..i still struggle to finish it up..especially for my case clerking..klau nak kire yg btol2 complete..i just manage clerk 1 patient..the others..haizz problem wif the history taking..somes of them, we didnt perform the PE..so xleh ler nak wat report..
1st supervisor meeting..really put us esp me, in a severe stage of stress..mana taknya..we all been ask to finish our case clerking n procedures by next week..ermm end up we all did not make it..but most of them manage to clerk 8 patients..they oso did finish the 10 procedures..haha its only me yg tertinggal train..wth..
well..yesterday totally my worst day ever..teruk kene tembak wif dr..looks like sy dah kene “aim” by my papa..he said dat he really not happy with my performance..coz i havent present any case for bst plus i oso cant answer his qs regarding the procedures that i observe..hanya tuhan jek yg tau perasaan sy time tu..rasa kecewa dgn diri sendiri..everyone did well except ME!
i realizes that my weakest point is..i dun have CONFIDENT..i really2 bad in communication..arrgghhh i hate myself for being so coward..hey Nurul!! speakk up please!! wats the point of keep dat inside??? speakk up!! be more confident!! dun just give the “blur face”! haha now rasainn lo..u already put urself in big2 trouble now...
next week, dr ask me to present at least 2 case during bst..die! i dun have any case to present..oh God please help me..i dun want dr to feel dissapointed with me again..2nd time dikecewakan...4sure dr will put me in the list of student yg berpotensi ntuk fail..haizz i really2 need to struggle n switch back pandangan dr towards me..ganbatte nurul!! dun give up!
hmmm for now..just forget bout dat first..jom beralih kpda crita yang lebih menarik..i bet u guys waiting for something else instead of listening to all my rungutan haha..
well during these 2 weeks, mmg adelah jga “sweet memory”..most of it berkaitan dgn BST..
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1st memory...kene shot wif dr sabah..msa 1st meeting tu..walaweh punyalah bahagia..we dun have to present the case..its more like lecture..dr teach us step of taking history n how to perform abdominal examination correctly...msuk 2nd meeting..omo!! dr bit angry coz we did not present the case like wat he expected..huhuhu ekceli dats the 1st time we handle post-op pt..manelah kmi tau chief complaint ntuk pre-op n post-op totally different...teruk kite org kene “lecture”..
start pda hari tu..we all kind of phobia wif dr sabah..he really2 particular with the sequence of history taking..he oso strictly warn us to not ever2 mentioned bout “there’s no significant finding” in our systemic review..but..dr hmp tell us the opposite..haizz..ottukay??
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2nd memory..kene marah patient..time tu 1st bst wif dr hmp bout respiratory..ekceli the patient not so willing to let us perform the PE to him..tengok dri riak muka patient pun tau..but dr still want to perform the PE..he ask some of us to do the PE..
before we start the PE..the pt alreary “warn” us..he said “kamu org ingat sy ni bahan uji kaji kamu ka!!?? sy rimas!!”..erm tersentap jugalah..we tot dr will leave the pt alone..haiizz xleh gak nak salahkan dr..manelah dr paham bahasa melayu kan..dr just igbore it n proceed with the discussion..
msa ivan nak examine bahagian blakang pt..we ask the pt to sit..hoho time tulah kmi kene fired kaw2!! suddenly the pt marah..he said “SUDAHLAH!! saya dah tak tahan lagi!! sy bukan bahan eksperimen kamu!!” aduiyaaii punyalah malu..dah ler time tu gp 1 oso there..coz later, dr got bst wif them..
sudah terang lagi bersuluh yg pt tu tgh marah n distress..dr still ask us to gain concern to examine his back..dr said if he dun wan us to examine..let him (dr) do the examination..omo! nasib ler pt tu bagi..so dr pun finish up the PE..
style dr hmp mmg berbeza skit..dia klau bleh nak kmi perform the PE during the bst..then after dat, he oso will do the PE coz he want to confirm our finding..
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so, 3rd memory..oso ada kaitan dgn hal tu...its kok leong turn to present the case..at first he did found a case at SMC..but sayangnya the pt already discharge..nasib ler time tu dr hmp blum smpai SMC..aduinaa..so kok leong need to find another case at QE..berjaya..but malangnya..during the bst..the pt gave us bermacam2 alasan..means dat we cant perform PE..
however..dr still want us to gain another consent..dr said..if the pt dun let all of us go kacau him..at least allow dr and few of us (yg penting not me) to perform the PE..aduii dashyat ooo dr hmp..if dr len..confirm just leave the pt alone haha..end up the pt bgi jga..adoii feels sorry for the pt..but wat to do..kmi ni just ikut arahan dr jek..
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4th memory..oso kaitan dgn bst dr hmp..but this time we dun have problem wif dr..the bst ekceli went very well..dr oso happy coz we able to find pt dat really cooperative..hoho alhamdulilah..tak sia2 pengorbanan tiah n me..
ekceli during our 1st supervisor meeting..dr already assigned tiah to present case on last wednesday..i be her partner to find the case..we couldnt find any abdomen case till tuesday..dunno how to say..both of us dilanda byk btol dugaan..at some point i just want to give up..but i really admire tiah..although so many things happen..she still acting cool n smilling..i wish i could be like her..
sabtu lalu..kmi kan ade bst dgn dr sharil n dr hmp..erm the same day kes kene marah pt tu...we plan to clerk pt after bst..but memandangkan kmi habis lambat..x sempat g clerking..tiah ajak g clerk hri ahad..huhu i can not make it coz dah janji nak outing wif my buddies..
so i ask tiah to survey2 pt dulu hri ahad tu..klau jmpa yg seswai isnin bru g clerk sama2...sayangnya tiah x jmpa any case..so isnin ler kmi decide g clerk sma2..skalinya..jadual isnin tu packed btol..kmi just ada msa nak clerk after 4pm..however..cuaca plak tak menyelebelahi kami..lebat giler hujan..smpai bleh banjir clinical block tu..hahaha lawak plak rasa coz luar gate tak banjir..kat dlm jek banjir..air naik mencecah paras paha..so how to go clerk pt??
tuesday..haizz if we still couldnt find any case we sure die one tomorrow..thanks god we found 1 pt dat has cholangitis..tu pun berbekalkan pertolongan group sifu..kmi dpt info bout the pt from them..somemore dorang ckp pt tu baik n really cooperative..
so, tgh hari tu me n tiah g uphill cri pt tu..sygnya time tu pt tu nak rest n ask us to dtg petang skit..ok fine..petang kmi dtg lagi...adoii bleh2 plak ada pelawat..ekceli suami pt tu baik..dia suh jek kmi approach his wife..tngu pnya tngu, pelawat tu mcm xnak berganjak dri situ..adoii xlma lgi kul 5 kmi ada bst..mana sempat nak clerk skang..so we said, we will come again at nite around 7pm cam tu..pt tu ckp ok no problem..
so..after bst..balik siswi solat jap then go uphill find the pt..changx2!!! wat do u guys expect?? hahaha the pt dah tido...mmg teda jodoh oo kmi dgn pt tu..suami dia ckp dia bru jek tido..maybe penat coz pgi td bru jek undergo buttock biopsy..
huhu kesian gak ler kat pt tu..coz kmi asyik g kacau dia jek..nak wat camne..we have to..nasib ler suami dia sporting..dia suh kmi dtg keesokan hari..omo!! esok kul 11 we have to present the case already..sempat ke???
somemore at 8am we got bst wif dr sabah at SMC..adoii die ooo die!! nak tak nak we only have time before 8 to clerk the pt..from QE nak rush p SMC..brape jek lah msa yg ada ntuk clerk..
so we decide bertolak 6.30 am semata-mata nak g clerk pt tu..kesian mizah trpksa g class awal pagi tu..hehe sorry mizah..btw jasamu akan kmi kenang..dlm 7.10am kmi smpai kat wad pt tu..fiuhh nasib pt tu dah bngun n siap mandi..ekceli we already got some info from fathimah regarding the pt..so we just need to tmbah2 apa yg patut..at first everything went well...tgh2 kmi tnya soalan,tb2 dr dtg ambik drah pt tu..haa lepas tu, pt start to feel uncomfortable..then she said, she want to rest n ask us to some again later...haizz sabar jek lah..
coz xnak ambik risiko..kmi direct tnya pt tu wether later we can do bst with her or not..the pt didnt give us answer yg jelas..she just said “tengok lah dulu..klau macik tak penat..boleh je..tak kisah”..haizz but tgk dri ayat pun tau mcm x rela jek..so..me n tiah decide to find other case! adoii susah2 jek follow macik tu dri smalam..
ekceli smlam we already told hanisa to ask dr postpone the bst to 4.30pm instead of 11 am..nasib dr ckp ok..so still has time to find case..
habis jek bst wif dr sabah around 11 am..kmi decide ronda2 kompleks A..no use to go uphill find previous pt..its enuff already Lol..
alhamdulilah..msa nak naik g survey pt at male ward A7..terserempak dgn rodtney..so sy tnya wether he has any case brkaitan abdomen..dia ckp ada..somemore dia bru jek buat PE kat pt tu..pt tu really cooperative..so me n tiah go find the pt..spt yg rodtney ckp..pt tu mmg cooperative and friendly..pak cik saipul! u’re the best hehe..
we manage to finish our clerking including the PE..the pt oso give us consent to let us do bst with him..but theres something yg merisaukan sy..coz dgr2 pt tu kene g scan petang tu..but dunno wats the exact time..
after finish clerking..kmi 2 balik siswi dgn hati yg riang coz able to find case last2 minit mcm ni..habis lecture dr david..we still have time bout 1 hour before the bst..me n tiah discussed bout the info..we solat first before we heading to find the pt..time tu kmi jln skali dgn nisa n along..suddenly, nisa pelik coz kmi 2 bergerak ke kompleks A..she ask us bukan dkat male ward c5 uphill ke?? kmi 2 ckp bukan..dkat male ward komplek A...adoii miscommunication..nisa already told everyone including the dr dat the pt is at uphill..
so, nisa pun contact dorang sume n bgi tau slah tempat..dah ler time tu hujan lebat..kmi berempat smpai A7..n guess wat..rsa mcm nak pitam biler tgk bed pt tu clean..takde penghuni..omo!! pt hilang!! mane plak pak cik saipul tu pegi?? we ask the nurse n she said pt tu baruuuuu jek kene transfer p male ward c5...hahahaha funny!! time tu btol2 dah rasa bersalah kat dorang sume..
msa kmi otw nak gerak p c5..terserempak dgn others gp member..they all just arrived from uphill..biler kmi ckp yg pt kene transfer p c5 uphill..dorang yg bru smpai tu seems bit angry with us..sorryy..kmi pun tak tau yg sume ni akan trjadi..yg nmpak sgt marah was mr K..nmpak sgt air muka dia menunjukkan sign menyampah dkat kmi..its show dat yg kmi ni tak tau buat kerja n tak boleh diharap..
msa otw p uphill sy suh tiah kol dorang yg ade kat uphill ntuk confirmkan wether pt ada x kat sana..dibuatnya pt takde..habis lah kmi..guess wat..dorang ckp takde pt yg bernama saipul kat situ..aikk?? ape ka?? impossible..smpai uphill me n tiah went to look at male surgery ward first kot2 nurse td bgi slah info..kmi ask nurse kat situ ade tak pt yg bru transfer p situ..nurse ckp ada..tp bukan pt yg brnama saipul..adoiii ottukay??
so, kmi 2 pun menuju ke ward c5..dorang yg len dah brkumpul d luar..tgk dri riak muka mmg nmpak hot..dorang ckp takde pun pt tu kat situ..me n tiah x puas hati..so g cari sndri..cri pnya cri..mmg takde pun pt tu..adehh mane plak pak cik ni mnghilang?? kmi btol2 x tau nak buat apa..somemore dr pun dah nak smpai...skalinya..ada nurse kat situ ckp..oh mr saipul? dia blum smpai lgi..otw p sini..dia p scan dulu b4 kene hantar p ward c5...x lama pas kmi brcakap dgn nurse tu..suddenly kmi nmpak kelibat mr saipul baru smpai dgn wife dia..hahaha hanya tuhan yg tau prasaan kmi time tu..hepi giler..
kmi pun once again ask the pt wether we can perform PE to him later...alhamdulilah..pt tu agree..but his wife said, if can give time to him to eat first coz td x smpat mkan..kmi pun ok jek lgipun kmi perlu present history dulu b4 do the PE..trima kasih banyak2 to mr saipul n his family..jasa korang akan kmi kenang..really2 glad can meet insan mcm mereka..kan best if sume patient peramah n cooperative mcm dorang..
so setalah bermacam2 dugaan yg kmi tempuh..the bst went quite well..dr oso berpuas hati coz he can perform the PE without any halangan haha..
so thats the story bout my 4th sweet memory..hak3 pnjang ler plak sy describes..
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5th...erm enuff lah kan crita psal bst..jom bralih p bnda lain...well hari slasa hri tu i got pupuk meeting..so me,rishi,sim n hong zhi have to escape dr rashidi class..ekceli bukan nak crita psal pupuk..but something else..
suhail mnta tolong dgn tiah to inform me yg dia nak suh sy tolong ambikkan parcel dia kat pjabat spu..sy ckp kat tiah x janji coz takut klau kmi rushing n x smpat nak singgah p SPU..but tiah ckp, klau boleh cuba lah..kesian kat suhail coz dah smnggu dia pnya lens spek rosak..bngkusan tu ekceli brisi spek baru dia..
well..i ekceli did help him to ambik the parcel..so smpai jek QE..kmi singgah siswi dulu simpan barang dlm loker..sy letak ler skali parcel suhail tu dlm loker..habis takkan nak bawa kehulur kehilir plak kan...
pas tu sy msj tiah n tnya dia katne skang..dia ckp dia kat uphill tgk prosedur BMA..so sy pun otw g sana..smpai2 sna trserempak dgn suhail..dia tnya mna parcel tu..sy ckp ler dlm loker..later sy bagi..dia pun ckp ok..msa otw g unit hematology tu..sy rsa mcm ada bnda terjatuh..but i just ignore it coz rushing mo p tgk prosedur..somemore tiah ckp tgal 1 jek lgi prosedur...
hbis tgk prosedur, g clerking dgn tiah..pas siap, kmi pun balik siswi rehat n solat..kwangx3 msa nak solat tu bru sy realize yg..OMO!!!!!! kunci loker hilang!!!!!!! aduiyaaaiii cam ne nak ambik brg dlm loker??? beg sy dgn parcel si suhail ada dlm tu..
sy try cari dlm siswi tu kot2 terjatuh..takde..alamak..takkan ler jatuh time kat uphill tu??nazak ler nak cari...then baru sy tringat yg sy realize ada bnda jatuh msa nak g hematology unit..aiyakk maybe kunci sy ade kat sana..so habis jek solat..sy ajak tiah g uphill..alasan clerk case (kes mak cik cholangitis tu)..tp tujuan utama mmg nak g cri kunci akeke..
brabis sy merayau2 dpan unit hematology tu..but still tak jmpa..huhuhu ottukay??
before g kelas dr david, i go find kak yg urus kunci tu..hehe x tau ler nma kakak tu..ala yg skali dgn en taib tu..kak tu bgi ler kunci spare..dia ckp klau hilang kunci kene ganti..adeh tak kisah ler..yg penting kuarkan dulu brg sy dlm loker tu..skalinya..kunci spare tu lsgung x bleh guna..brabis sy n tiah try..still x dpt..aik pelik2..
so g lgi cri kakak tu..then kak tu suh try cri from other gugusan kunci yg brwarna biru..somemore sy pnya kunci mmy wrna biru penanda dia..yg akak tu bgi td penanda hijau..
so kmi pun cari lah..skalinya x jmpa pun kunci yg bertag 19..kak tu pelik..then dia tnya, msa dpt kunci hri tu, dpt skali dgn tag dia ke? sy ckp ye..then kak tu tnya lgi..time tu ada 1 kunci jek ke? sy ckp ye..hohoho guess wat..akak tu ckp if dat so, means tu jek lah 1-1 nya kunci yg ade..manada spare lgi..omg!! apekaahh!?? so camne sy nak ambik brg2 tu?? kak tu ckp later dia try tnya en taib kot2 ada kunci spare pda dia..kak tu ask me to find her petang nnti..
msa lecture dr david..suhail dah brabis bgi signal mnta parcel dia..haha sorry bebanyak..sy pun bgi tau ler yg kunci loker sy hilang..suh dia bersabar dulu..Lol kesian suhail..tak psal2 terjebak sama..
habis lect, g r cri akak tu..huhuhu akak tu ckp mmg xde kunci spare dah..nak x nak trpksa pecahkan loker tu..but b4 that she need to ask prof chin permission first..mane bleh suke2 hati nak pecahkan loker..wat the hell...haizz perlu ke involve prof chin dlm hal ni haha..
kak tu tnya lgi byk ke brg dlm loker tu..sy ckp ler sume brg sy dlm tu..beg sy sume kat dlm..akak tu ckp “ala kesiannya..klau mcm tu kmu try dulu pecahkan loker tu skang..tp jgn kasar sgt..make it selembut yg mngkin” Lol lawak r akak tu..
hehe org yg hilangkan kunci was me..but i already trouble so many people..really sorry guys...hehe trime kasih bnyak2 kat dorang chanlen n ema yg bertungkus lumus tolong sy memecahkan loker tu..end up loker tu brjaya dipecahkan with minimum kadar kerosakan..arigatou ne!
since then, i dun use loker anymore..haizz phobia!
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6th...banjir banjir banjir...mmg lawak ler..bleh2 plak tgh2 bandar dilanda banjir..mulenya kmi tak prcaya biler senior ckp kwsan clinical block tu slalu dilanda banjir even hujan kejap je..coz kwsan tu mmg rendah berbanding kwasn lain..
so, isnin lalu, kmi sume menyaksikan sndri clinical block dinaiki air..omo..its really real..smpaikan paras paha..unbelievable but its true haha..nasib ler time kmi balik, air dah start surut bawah paras lutut..
oh ye, slain crita banjir, ade 1 kejadian sweet brlaku msa kmi sume redah pintu gate nak naik bus..kmi sume dah slamat duk dlm bus..ekceli wing ho pun dah seberang..tp yg pelik x nmpak kay mint..rupanya2 wingho menyeberang g hntar beg n letak dlm bus..later bru g jemput kay mint..wing ho siap dukung kay mint dri blakang merentas air tu..hahaha wat a sweet kapel..kmi sume senyum je tgk dorang trmasuk abg bus tu..tak bleh bla btol..msti abg bus tu tgh tringat ister kat rumah hahaha...
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orait so far tu ler kejadian2 menarik yg brlaku spjang 2 mnggu ni..mcam2 yg terjadi kan..tp yg pasti i’m still blur with this module haha..
ekceli there’s 1 more thing yg sy nak share wif u guys..takde kaitan dgn hal school..its bout my family..haizz its almost make me diserang heart attack...syukur everything just fine huhu..if not, i dun know wat will happen..
critanya macam ni..mlam isnin tu i kol my mom..coz dah smnggu sy tak kontek my family...dgr dri nada suara my mom mcm sakit je..mcm biasa sy tnya ler keadaan my family..my mom said, smlam dia nyaris meninggal nasib ler umur panjang..terkejut sy dgr statement mak sy..aik ape yg brlaku sebenarnya?
maa sy ckp smalam tgh hari..dia terkena kejutan elektrik..time tu hujan lebat..karen plak skejap ada skejap takde (blackout)..time tu my mom kat dapur nak kemas barang....maa sy nak simpan buah limau dlm peti ais..msa maa sy buka peti ais tu (sebelah tgan), dia rsa mcam ada aliran eletrik..tak lama pas tu, my mom rsa mcm peti tu menarik dia..mcm magnet..suddenly, my mom terpelanting ke blakang dgn peti ais tu skali..nasib ler time tu pintu dapur terbuka so my mom terhumban ke luar n kene hempap skit jek dgn peti tu..nasib peti ais tu tak meletup..bayangkan ler betapa kuat eletrik yg ada pda peti ais tu smpaikan bleh “terbang” skali wif my mom haizz..i juz cant imagine wat will happen if peti ais tu meletup...Ya Allah syukur alhamdulilah maa sy selamat..nasib ler jga time tu abah sy sume ada kat rumah..
berderau darah sy biler dgr crita maa sy..ye lah coz msa kejadian tu, sy plak tgh outing dgn dorang..sy tgh bersuka ria while kat rumah plak bleh berlaku kejadian yg macam tu..dats why pepatah mengatakan yang malang tak berbau..
moral of the story..just be careful in everything we do n somemore, wlau busy mcm mana pun, slalu2 lah kontek parents n tnyakan khabar..coz we never know wat will happen in the future..
to my family...i loveeee u guysss so much!!
“Ya Allah semoga engkau panjangkanlah umur kedua ibu bapa kami...peliharalah keselamatan kami dan jauhkanlah kami daripada sebarang musibah..”
amin amin ya ra’bal’alamin...
p/s: 2day i went SMC clerk pt with amin..well, we brjaya clerk 2 pt..well, dats the 1st time i clerk pt with amin..haha lawak btol c amin ni..esp masa dia perform PE kat abang uropathy...kesian abg tu..mcm kene buat as “manequin” jek ..nasib ler abg tu pun sporting hak3..after slesai clerk case, kmi singgah 1B makan..erm haha ekceli klau nak diikutkan, masa yg kmi spent d 1B lgi lama brbanding d SMC..Lol ottukay...mmg susah nak buang tabiat hedonism ni hoho..
okay dats all my update ntuk kali ni..next update maybe pas exam kot..hahaha harap bersabar..
yosshh after dis i shud fokus on my stuff..so many things to do..asyik postpone jek..mmg saje je nak cri pasal dgn dr hmp haizz..Nurul ganbatte ne!!
-the end-
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