bismillahirahmanirahim…
ok tiba2 rasa macam nak update blog plak hari ni..haha padahal exam tak lama lagi, study pun tak habis lagi (erm masalahnye aku dah start ke blom?? lol!) hahaha yang penting stakat ni mood study tu tak dtg lagi..takpe2 esok aku study ok..aku janji~~~ hehehe
hmm ekceli tak tau nak crite psal ape..byk ekceli tp mcm dah tak brape ingat..takpe2, aku try ntuk recap lah ye..
aku taknak crite panjang2, kang lame ler plak aku spent time..haizz..
Fall in love with MSP
hoho mcm tak percaya jek kan, yelah awal2 aku kan ckp aku tak suke posting ni..stress kot byk bnda kene buat esp part penuhkan logbook tu..somemore kes fobia dgn dr AAM tu..
tp ntuk masa sebulan ni aku muler rase suke dgn posting ni..bgi aku takde ler busy mane..cume kadang tu terpaksa ler balik mlm coz klas start pkul 5..biasenye klas abg jaya lah..tp dah lame dh takde klas dgn dia..cuma nnti 6th week ade last session dgn dia..haizz time tu msti stress punye..
so far aku rase aku blaja byk ler esp ntuk session dgn dr shaila..mane taknye ward round 2 jam + bst 2 jam.. boleh tepu otak ok~ haha tp serius suke the way dia mengajar.. dia pun suke jugak tnya2 soalan, tp takde stress mcm dr AAM (x_x)
p/s: haizz nxt week ade bst dgn dr aam..arggghhh stresss!!
aku mula start suke msp ni biler start jumpe wad acute female ward..haha bayangkan ler dah 2 minggu kmi kat situ tp just minggu ke 3 baru kmi discover psal wad tu..dulu kmi ingat wad downhill yg ekceli wad chronic female tu wad acute..rupenye salah..nasib ler keneth lead ke arah yg betol..
dekat acute female wad tu mmg blaja byk ler..lgipun kmi buat ward round pun dgn dr shaila hari tu..mmg bermanfaat giler ler..rasanya hari tu kmi mcm master jek bab2 acute pulmonary edema and CCF ni..mane taknye omost sume pt kat situ dtg dgn kes yg sama haha..
somemore all the dr’s, nurses & sister nice2..takde ler nak kekwat2 dgn medical students ni..sepatutnya staff acute wad ni garang2 kan, yelah wad acute kot..tp dorang sume nice je..takde pun nak halau2 or marah2 kmi klau kmi berkerumun kat situ..HO pun mcm ala2 kawan2 gitu..hehe dorang plak yg approach kiteorg..
lepas pada hari tu mmg aku ngan ra rajin ler lepak kat wad tu..lgipun alasan ke-2 knapa aku suke pegi wad tu adalah disebabkan sorang MO ni (jap lgi aku crite)…hehehe biaselah dah ade target katekan hahaha..
cume yg tak bestnye msp ni sebab klau balik bilik je confirm penat..mmg jarang dpt spent time ntuk study..aku pun mcm sekali je dpt stay up..tak mcm dulu rajin je stay up..haizz tp start next week kene rajin ler stay up coz byk lgi tak cover kot!!
Dr Kyaw Thet (a.k.a Dr Kiaw)
OMG!! aku tak sangka dr yg chinese look tu sebenarnya MO dari myanmar!!! mmg sukar dipercaya ok..sebab muke dia mmg chinese look..
aku first nmpak dia dri 1st week lgi msa dekat clinic nephro..masa tu aku tgk dia ala2 ho..sebab dia nmpak sgt muda..lgipun msa tu ade specialist ni pngil dia ntuk bincang kes..mcm gaye ho jek lah biler tgk..tp msa tu mmg dah terpikat dh sebab dia sgt comel ~<3
masa nak join clinic tu kmi mmg tau ade sorang MO myanmar, klau nak join clinic boleh folow MO tu sebab nurse ckp kmi boleh tlg jadi translator ntuk dia..masa tu kmi ade nmpak sorang dr kat dlm bilik, muke dia iras2 dr jotey, dr tu mmg tua lah..kmi mati2 ingat dr tu lah kot MO myanmar yg nurse ckpkan..biler tgk dr tu, mcm tak interested ler plak nak join clinic kan..so aku ngan ra blah ler pegi cari clinic lain..hahaha jahat giler kan..last2 kmi folow clinic rheumato dr eleen chong yg sy crite dulu..
then, masa dekat acute female wad tu, nmpak lgi dr chinese look tu..masa tu tgh specialist round…dr tu ader ler skali..mmg dia mcm ho kot! then tb2 teng siew ckp yg dr tu lah MO myanmar..aku mmg mati2 tak percaya..dr tu lansung takde gaya muke myanmar pun..tp biler dgn dia speaking….=.= hahaha mmg typical myanmar ler..
patutler dr tu tak paham BM..kejap2 msti pangil student nurse tlg translate ntuk dia..haha kesian dr..
pastu dr tu rajin je dok soal2 kami..masa kmi tgh tnggu dr shaila dtg, dia sempat sruh kmint present kes yg dia cover tu..then biler kmi tak dpt jwb soalan dia, dia boleh ugut nak report kat lecturer..lol!! mentang2 ler satu negara kan..siot je..
tp yg bestnye msa aku ngan ra tgh cari kes ntuk dr neren, dia boleh approach kmi & tnya “who r u”..kmi jwb ler “med students”..dia ckp “i know..which year?” haha lol..kmi jwb “5th year” then dia trus suh aku ngan ra take hx & examine sorang pt ni..kmi msa tu dah ler kejar masa kan sebab tak jumpe kes ntuk dr neren..tup2 terstuck plak kat situ..
kmi pun clerk je lah pt tu..rupenye pt tu ade right pleural effusion..PE pun byk ler findings..msa tu dr kyaw brabis soal psal signs of effusion..hoho nasib ler boleh jwb..dr pun mcm puas hati je..then sempat lgi tgk dia buat USG..dia mmg nmpak interest ler nak mngajar kiteorg..haha start situ ler makin suke kat dr tu <3
aku pun ekceli dah add dr tu kat fb..thanks to chalen coz ade cop dr tu so boleh la search nama dia kat fb…rupenye ade fb jugak hehe..yang bestnye dr tu baru jek approved friend req aku td weeeeee~~~~~ pasni senang ler nak stalk dia hak3..
rasenye pasni mmg takkan jumpe dia dh..hari tu try pegi cari dia kat clinic dgn hasrat nak follow clinic dia coz hari sebelumnye chalen ader folow dia (haizz kes jeles ler ni)..tup2 hari tu bukan turn dia handle clinic..nurse ckp next week baru ade..haizz next week manelah kmi nak pegi clinic dh..somemore list clinic pun dah full..adoiii mmg takde jodoh ler ngan dr tu..nasib jek boleh stalk tru on9 hohoho >..<
Conflicts oh Conflicts
lately byk plak conflicts dalaman yg berlaku dlm group posting aku..haizz stress biler difikirkan..aku rase pasal tu tak payah ler aku citer lebih2, lgipun tak melibatkan aku pun..kang tak pasal2 jad kes mengumpat plak..ish2 tak patut..
ape yang aku boleh ckp aku sgt merindui gp 4th year aku..rase mcm kmi semua satu kepala satu jiwa..semua jenis sempoi & giler2..group skrng hmmm fhm2 sendiri jek lah…tp at least aku masuk jugak ler dgn sub group aku & so far takde ler bnda2 yang tak best berlaku among gp members aku..huh nasib baik!
masalah skrg ni just byk berkaitan dgn miscommunication antara leader ler..haizz nak komen lebih2 pun susah, yelah aku pun tau susah kot role sorang leader ni..byk benda kene handle..so tak elok ler nak komplen itu ini..takpelah, bersabar je lgi seminggu..
Him
haizz crite psal dia, stress plak aku rasa..ntah ler, lgipun skrg ni dah jarang spent time dgn dia..konon je minggu awal2 tu nk study sama2..end up jarang pun kmi study..most of time mmg tak jadi dgn alasan penat coz klas hbis lmbat..aku pun awal2 dulu busy coz klas jayaram..dia pun slalu gak ade klas smpai lewat petang..
kadang tu ade jugak ler smpai seminggu tak jumpe..hmm awal2 tu terseksa ler jugak jiwa kan..yelah geram kot coz dia mcm takde hati pun nak study sama..ader satu minggu tu aku agak free ler jugak, klas pun takdelah smpai petang..tp dia plak lnsung takde kontek2 ajak study..aku pun mls ler nk tnya coz aku tau klau dia tak kontek tu maknenye dia tak free la nak spent time dgn aku kan..mcm hari tu, aku try ler msj dia tnya kbar & tnye awat lame tak kontek kan..rupenya minggu tu dia busy layan anua..huh fine..tp ekceli lega ler biler tau reason dia tu..haha ~.~
but then lately, makin jarang jugak dia kontek..nak ckp dia busy, takde ler sgt.. mcm this week, isnin hari tu pndai plak dia cari aku lepas seminggu menyepi..aku masa tu dh malas nk fikir pasal dia..eseh kire mcm nak give up la..aku fikir lantak dia lah nak buat ape..nnti klau dia rasa dia perlukan aku pndai ler dia cari..tp aku mmg dh dlm fasa ntuk just ignore jek..weekend tu pun dia lnsung tak kontek aku..tak sure ler plak dia ade klas ke tak kan..tp tgk sempat je pegi odec..tak tau ler dia pegi dgn sape..malas nak fikir huh! (lol tdi ckp tak kisah..haizz apekah aku ni..)
then isnin tu dia kontek ajak study..aku pun ok fine..tp 2 hari jek lah kmi study..start rabu tu dah tak study sama..dgn alasan klas aku hbis lmbt..coz hari tu aku bst dgn dr lily pkul 5-7pm.. tp aku ekceli ok je klau nak study..but then dia ckp takpelah, just study sendiri jek lah coz dia assume aku mesti letih kan..(haizzz klau aku dh ckp aku ok je, means ok ler..klau tak ok aku akn ckp ape aku letih..eeeee geram!!)
pastu hari ni pun tak jadi study lagi..sebab td masa dia msj tu aku still kat cp..so aku ckp ler aku tak sure bleh start study pkul 8 ke tak..aku takde pun ckp aku tak nak study..then dia plak trus reply klau tak sempat takpelah just study sendiri je..aku pun mls nk ckp lebih2 so fine study sendiri je lah..
aku rasa klau berlarutan mcm ni bgus tak payah study sama lah..lagipun aku ngan dia bukan sama posting pun kan,ekceli no point ler jugak study sma..maybe skrg ni dia dh slesa kot study sndri2..ok fine la up to him..
ikutkan hati mmg kecewa lah..
hmmm then soal hati dan perasaan plak, aku tak tau lah ape yg harus aku buat skrg…aku rasa mcm mengharapkan sesuatu yang tak pasti,sesuatu yang tak akan kunjung tiba..ntah ler, dh byk kali kot bnda yg sama berlaku..tapi aku je yang tak serik2..dlm byk2 org knapalah mesti dia??lagipun obviously dia just anggap aku best budy dia jek kot..aku takde pun ciri2 org yg dia suka..so…should i just let the feeling go again???rasa mcm buang masa & menyeksa jiwa je kan..tp tulah, susah kot nak buang perasaan tu..4 years definitely long enuff kan T^T
sometimes aku fikir kan bagus klau aku tak kenal rapat dgn dia..huuuuh
A.L.O.N.E
ok another bad news for me..i just found out that fira will be going back during this holiday..
1st impression aku..haruslah terkejut..coz aku dpt tau pun dari edit..seriusly sgt terkilan masa tu..knapa fira tak inform sendiri kat aku?dah ler masa tu kmi 3 outing pegi cp..aku yg ajak kluar coz nk ajak tgk “hantu kapcai”..msa nak beli tiket tu aku nmpak iklan movie “paranormal 4” nak kluar hujung oct nnti..means msa cuti ler kan..so aku dgn excitednya ajak ler fira tgk msa cuti nnti..suddenly edit mention yg fira balik masa cuti nnti..
aku specchless..rase mcm nak nangis pun ade..aku tau fira dah rase serba salah time tu..aku seriusly takde mood dh msa tu..msa makan pun aku just mendiamkan diri je..aku tak tau nak ckp ape..nak marah pun rasa mcm takde maknenye..yelah layak ke aku nak marah? knapa plak aku harus marah? sape aku nak halang org dri balik rumah kan..
masa tu aku just fikir yg aku akan keseorangan sepanjang cuti tu..tak tau ler mcm mana aku nak lalui cuti tu nanti..
ekceli msa tu aku cubalah juga ntuk kawal diri..yelah klau aku bad mood memanjang mesti sia2 je outing hari tu..tak fun ler kan..
masa nak pegi surau tu fira say sorry coz dia terlupe nak mention psal tu..dia bgi tau jugak ler sebab knpa dia balik..rupenye mak dia suruh balik lgipun atok dia tak brape sihat kan..ok lah fine..its ok..
yang tak bleh tahannye fira sempat plak tulis sorry note kat aku gune pamphlet blood donation tu..haha thanks anyway :)
tp ekceli makin sedey lagi ade lah biler baca surat fira tu..mane taknya coz dia mati2 ingat yang amin tak balik cuti nnti, so aku bleh la spent time dgn dia kan..tp for ur information cik fira, dia balik..awal lagi dia dah beli tiket balik..haha sadis kan..
biler aku mention psal tu kat fira, dia btol2 sorry kat aku…haizz no need to sorry la..tb2 aku rasa mcm aku ni asyik membebankan org je..tak pasal2 org rasa serba salah kan..tak payah risau ler fira, i’m ok..i’m 23 years old ady bha..not a child anymore..sure i know how to take care of my self..so u dun need to worry k ;) later just enjoy ur holiday to the max..
Other stories :
1. Dr Kanan teaching session, really enjoyable, dia ni ala2 dr praba coz lagi byk bercerita drp mengajar..haha hari tu dia boleh2 tnya sape keenam..coz keenam tak nmpak mcm med students & dia nmpak tua..lol sabar je lah dgn statement dr tu..tp dia ckp ler dia just gurau je jgn ambik hati, lgipun dia ckp mesti ada antara kmi yg suke gak mengata psal saiz bdn dia yg cute tu..tp dia tak kisah pun..haha comel je dr tu..seriusly mcm teddy bear kot >.< pastu dia ajar psal examination of respi pun simple jek..mula2 dgr tu mcm tak masuk akal jek, coz lain dgn cara biasa yg kite blajar sblom ni..tp sebenarnye betol jugak ler teori dia tu..for those yg pernah ade session dgn dia sure know what i mean ^^
2. Last monday kmi ade teaching session wif dr shaila..mcm biaselah klau dgn dr confirm lame giler..habis WR kmi ade bst lgi..ekceli aku dah tak tahan dah masa pt last ntuk WR tu..aku rase mcm dah ade symptoms hypotension..so aku minta diri ntuk rehat..mulenye lepas duduk rehat tu plan ler jugak nak smbung folow bst kan..tp aku still rasa mcm pening2, so aku decide trus balik restroom rehat..nasib ler aku buat decision yg betol..klau tak confirm aku collapse msa bst tu haha.. ekceli selain aku, ade lgi sorang student yg omost fainting..hehe miss kaymint..sian dia hypoglycemic..aku tau pun ra yg crite..last2 bst tu juz last ntuk sejam je kot..coz dr taknak nnti makin ramai plak yg collapse haha..lol lemah btol members gp B ni =.=”
3. Hari ni bst dgn dr timothy super best!!! dah ler buat klas ka Lin Zhi hospital..nice leh tempat tu..tenang & cantik..mmg mcm tempat bercuti..rasanye dulu tmpat tu hotel kot..berbalik psal bst tu, as usual dr buat short cases dgn kmi..tdi aku kene examine kes respi..nasib pt tu aku mmg dah examine sedia, so msa dr suruh aku examine tu kire smooth jek lah..dorang sempat perli lgi ckp aku examine td ikut style dr kanan…haha harusler, kan dah kene ajar, harus dipraktiskan ^^ the best past is msa dr timothy beri aku 1 stgh minit ntuk present summary finding aku,differential dgn investigations skali..3 kali kot aku kene ulang coz tak menepati kehendak dr..tp ekceli mmg fun la..rasa mcm dlm exam kot haha.. nasib dr ckp aku kire pass hoho wlpun aku xdpt nak elicit yg pakcik tu ade barrel chest..huhu ekceli aku tak brape pndai sgt nk tgk psal chest deformity ni..haizz kene byk praktis ni..then dr ajar psal skin examination..dia bgi kiteorg checklist ape yg perlu kmi present psal skin lesion tu..so mmg senang ler biler dh ade check list tu..kirenye kite takde lah loss masa nak present tu kan..mmg fun la tdi..yg penting dia ckp kmi kene byk praktis on how to present everything in a short period..mesti makesure yg kite present smpai investigation..barulah boleh dpt good marks..lgipun 5th year its all about management bha kan..oklah dr, we’ll try our best!!
4. OMG!!! another crush~~~dr tu 2nd year HO & skrg ade dekat lin zhi >.< ekceli dah pernah nmpak dr tu msa paeds last year..masa tu tgk dia ok lah..muke boleh tahan..dia iras2 anua..tp spec dia tu buatkan dia mcm nmpak nerd..so tak brape suke la dr tu msa tu..but then td terkejut ler coz nmpak dr tu ade kat lin zhi..gaya dia still sama..tp yg buat aku tb2 suke tu biler tgk dia dok supervised ho lain buat long line insertion..masa tu aku nmpak dia sgt cool kot..ala2 MO gitu bgi arahan..dah ler speaking..nmpak cool giler @.@ yelah mcm impress ler, coz msa last year nmpak dia mcm blur2 jek..skrg ni ala2 pro gitu hehe yelah kan dah msuk 2 tahun HO bha..argghhh cute la dr tu!! haizz tp sayangnye dr tu dh ade gf..tu pun dpt tau dri ra coz dulu dorang pun penah stalk dr tu..lol.. haizz takpelah, bukan aku bercita2 nak jadi gf dia pun kan..hahaha just buat stok crushes je maa >_< tak salah pun kan hee hee
aku rase sampai sini jek lah ye…tu pun dah macam cincai giler je entry aku ni..macam2 plak citer kluar..tak tersusun lansung..biaselah aku klau buat essay ni mana ade pakai2 draft tu sume haha..
k lah bye!!
p/s: hopefully dlm msa seminggu ni aku boleh fokus ntuk study!!! ganbatte minna san!! semoga segalanya dipermudahkan untuk kita semua nanti :)
haha so true!!
millions wishes of good luck :)
p/s: the closing of my entry, just wanna to share this song lyric..hmm dunno, the lyric really catch my feeling haha
“RED - Taylor Swift”
Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street
Faster than the wind
Passionate as sin, ended so suddenly
Loving him is like trying to change your mind
Once you're already flying through the free fall
Like the colors in autumn
So bright just before they lose it all
Losing him was blue like I'd never known
Missing him was dark grey all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you've never met
But loving him was red
Loving him was red
Touching him is like realizing all you ever wanted was right there in front of you
Memorizing him was as easy as knowing all the words to your old favorite song
Fighting with him was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there's no right answer
Regretting him was like wishing you never found out love could be that strong
Losing him was blue like I'd never known
Missing him was dark grey all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you've never met
But loving him was red
Oh red burning red
Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes
Tell myself it's time now, gotta let go
But moving on from him is impossible
When I still see it all in my head
Burning red!
Darling it was red!
Oh, losing him was blue like I'd never known
Missing him was dark grey all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you've never met
Cause loving him was red yeah yeah red
We're burning red
And that's why he's spinning round in my head
Comes back to me burning red
Yeah yeah
Cause love was like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street.
- the end -